Updated: Nov 19, 2021
I used to think “missing” someone I let go of was my indication that I made the wrong decision. I thought that was my psyche telling me “remember the good times? It can be like that again. You blew this way out of proportion. Go back. Go back Go back.”
But I’ve learned that missing someone is generally more about missing the memories. Missing those brief moments of bliss that WERE real. But were not lasting. In fact they were few and far between on the tail end of those times.
We are ever evolving. Constantly growing. Energetically constantly shifting forms. Therefore your point of resonance is slightly different than what it used to be. Which means who & what is healthy for you today may be different from who & what was healthy for you back then.
It takes a very long time to really understand relationships that were healthy, may not be healthy for you now. For who and what life carved you out to be today. And that relationships that didn't work out are NOT FAILURES. Because there are people out there who look at every relationship that didn't end up in marriage of their past as failures. When none of them are failures. You moved in the direction of that because your consciousness knew that that relationship or experience would help fine-tune your desires to allow in what you REALLY want in your life. That relationship helped you discover more of who you really are and what you really want. Teaching you how to REALLY honor the way YOU feel, as opposed to honor the way you were told to think and feel. Oh, yes. That means that people who you thought were good for you and genuinely are good people still today are not necessarily healthy for you in your path today.
In fact holding onto these connections with these people can you stall your growth. In a way that is both frustrating AND painful.
Ultimately, yes, it is about knowing your value. Your intrinsic worth. This is really the only way that process doesn't become messy or result in fights or fallouts. But there are relationships that you recall in your life that did fall way, but were not “fallouts.” A mutual respect and an understanding you both share for your individual chosen paths.
Chances are you're not thinking about them anymore. And you forgot about them. And that's the point. The past doesn't matter. The past informs the present moment and the present moment is here. So look here. Actually the more time you think about them back then (even if it was positive), the more resistance you are accumulating. Because are re-activating all the old belief patterns/vibrations/identities/cords from that experience just by thinking about it. And you will see how quickly that will derail your flow you have going NOW in your life.
And if you haven't got a flow going right now, it's because you are thinking about the past. There's some thing you are holding onto because you think that by thinking about it, there is a way to rectify it. Trauma is the least unique thing about us. Because everyone has it. So what can we do with knowing that piece of information that is completely universal to everyone that’s ever existed? The only thing we can do. Move forward. Because you cannot move backwards in a world without a pause button. And trust that life will continue providing experiences to help you figure out who you TRULY and INTRINSICALLY are. And the closer you are to that, the closer you are to the people who will resonate with you and your energy. And boy, does resonance feel good. True connection is when two individuals vibrate the same in one moment. It is to truly be SEEN. I’ve had to make a lot of hard decisions in the past, but I know I am cleared headed and more focused in life because of it. And in each moment I miss my family or old friends, I remind myself of who I am today. And that I, along with every other human in the world, have a right to vibrational resonance.
In other words, you have a right to be here. You have a right to be seen for who you are. You have a right to be loved in the right ways. It is your birthright to be in your power. To shine your light as bright as you possibly can and dim it for NO ONE and NO REASON. Under ANY circumstance. With Love,